dentist

me: husb, i think i need to go to the dentist.
bry: ok.
me: i'm just saying, i was brushing my teeth and i saw a tiny brown speck on two teeth. they don't hurt though, so maybe it's nothing.
bry: have you ever had a cavity before, wifey?
me: no, why?
bry: because cavities don't hurt.
me: WHAT?!?! i thought they were supposed to hurt! oh no, i'm so cavitied right now.
bry: you're not cavitied until a professional examines you and says you are.
me: ok, well, i think i need to go to the dentist. what if i have to get fillings?!
bry: i'm sure you're fine, but if you do, then you won't even notice them.
me: i will notice them! i've never had them!
bry: you'll be fine...
me: ugh. i'm cavitied.
bry: wifey...

i'm a little ridiculously obsessed with having healthy teeth. i think it's because i used to have a re-occuring nightmare in which my teeth would turn to mush as i was talking and then dissolve into nothing.

those two tiny specks are the beginning of my worst nightmare. next comes the toothy mush...sigh.