dearest husb

dearest husb,

since i'm sure you're wondering how our first day of preschool at home went, i thought i would put an end to your suspenseful suffering and provide you with an update.

as you know, our day was supposed to start with a treasure hunt for school supplies (thanks for helping me hide those), however the hunt was postponed on account of nate pooping his pants. i don't blame him though since i did tell him to stay in the box castle with asher until i called for them. he followed those directions of staying put excellently. when we realized he was making his own treasure in his pants, he was rushed to the potty to finish up his business. asher was very disgruntled, after being holed up in the stinky castle with his brother, to find that he was going to have to wait for nate to finish on the potty before he could start searching for supplies.
asher: uhhhhh! why is he taking so long to poop?
me: asher, you can't rush pooping, bud. he's just gotta take his time and get it all out.
asher: i know, but he's taking foreeeeevvveeer!
me: well, babe. try to be patient.
asher: why do i have to wait on him?
me: because you're going to be a treasure hunting team! it'll be more fun together!
nate: cuz i'm pooping, ashwer!!!
asher: ugh. i know, nate. i know. just hurry up.
after we wrapped up potty time, the treasure hunt commenced! the boys had so much fun finding the glue, pencils, scissors, and crayons and putting them in our homemade treasure box.

then, we started our school lessons learning about how God's word is a treasure. we introduced the letter X by taping a big letter on the floor with painter's tape. then we jumped, skipped, walked, and tiptoed across practicing the letter X sound while we went. we did lots of other activities with the letter X, but there is one i felt the need to warn you about. i thought bringing out trays of salt to practice writing the letter X sounded like a really fun idea. you know, it's sensory writing practice. it was going really well until our sons' mighty imaginations turned the salt into snow... and then they needed tractors to move the snow... and then the tractors couldn't possibly leave the snow in one place because they were there to do some work...and the work involved pushing the snow into the floor so the boys could make snow angels. it may have gotten a little salty up in here. and i may have thought that was okay because i could just sweep it up. however, it turns out that it may be pretty difficult to sweep and/or vacuum up salt. who knew, right? so try not to grumble while you are stepping on tiny grains of salt that have been scattered all over our house and will remain there until the end of time. just think about how much fun your boys had practicing their letter writing...and their snow plowing. OR just keep your socks on so it's not as noticeable.

and while i'm already on a roll with the confessing of supervised messes that occurred today, there's something else you should probably know. as i was trying to sweep/ vacuum/ scoop up by hand all of the salt, i sent the boys to play in the backyard. good, innocent, energy emptying time outside. yeah, except remember the other day when i kind of taught them how to turn on the outside faucet so that they could fill up those plastic cups and throw water on each other? yeah, that right there bit me in the butt today.
asher: mom!!
me: yeah, bud?
asher: nate looks like a brown batman!
me: huh? ok! i'll be there in a minute. let me finish sweeping.
asher: ok! it's cool! he's just got mud all over his face!
me: WHAT?!
apparently, if you let that outside faucet run it makes an awesomely filthy mud puddle in which our children felt the need to roll in. and lay down in. and throw mud from. and paint the side of the house with such mud. and then run screaming with their swamp thang selves when it was time to get rinsed off and hauled to the tub. no, i mean i literally had to catch nate with a towel and haul him to the the tub. it's a miracle that there isn't mud splattered all throughout our house. or maybe there is and i just choose to be blind because i have cleaned up enough mud to meet my mud cleaning quota for the whole year in one day. this one, very first, filthy day of preschool at home.

so here are the two things i learned from school today:
1.) homeschooling boys is clearly going to be an adventure. a messy, stock-up-on-the-cleaning-supplies-now, not-quite-what-i-planned adventure.
2.) i need an iphone to document such adventures. get on that, husb.

love,
your happy to stay at home and clean up life's messes wifey