slobber

me: oh, you've got something on your face.
*i lick my finger and wipe the grim off his chubby cheek
asher: ok.
*he licks his finger and wipes it on my cheek
me: why did you do that?
asher: because you did it.
me: why do you think i did it?
asher: because you like to wipe your slobber on people.

precisely, son.