Thursday, December 26, 2013

what we've been talking about lately

asher: didn't you just go to the doctor? why do you have to go to the doctor so much? are you really sick?
me: no, bud. i have to keep going to the doctor because i've got a tiny little baby in my belly.
asher: WHAT?! WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A BABY?!?!
me: yep. next summer.
asher: NATE! WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A BABY BROTHER! wait, will it be a brother or a sister?
me: we won't find that out for a while. which do you hope it is?
asher: a sister! because we don't have one of those…except then we'd have to buy dolls and stuff and i don't like dolls so, a brother! NATE! WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A BROTHER AND THEN WE CAN WRESTLE HIM!
me: well, you'll have to wait a while to wrestle him, babe.
asher: ohhhh, ok. Nate we'll have to wait a few days, but then we can wrestle him!
nate: let me see it.
me: you can't see the baby yet, bud.
nate: but i need to find it.
me: why do you need to find it?
nate: because it's a baby and babies need mommies. i have to find it so i can find its mommy.
me: well, i'll be its mommy, babe.
nate: NO! you're asher and nate's mommy!
me: well, now i am asher, nate and the new baby's mommy.
nate: well, let me just find it.
*he lifts up my shirt.
me: soon my belly will start getting bigger and then you'll be able to tell, but we won't get to meet the baby until next summer.
nate: hmmm, ok.

we are so excited and thankful to be adding another member to the mcclelland clan in july 2014.

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

sore

nate: what's dat, mom? you got a burger.
me: no, it's not a booger, bud. it's a boo boo.
nate: how did you get a boo boo?
me: i just did.
nate: but hooooow?
*he touches it and says sympathetically
nate: asher did it, huh?
me: what? no, asher didn't do it, silly!
nate: come on! tell me how!
me: well, my nose got sick and then it left a sore there.
nate: ohhhhh. so daddy has to take you to the hospital.
me: no, i won't have to go to the hospital.
nate: but your nose is sick.
me: yeah, but i already have some medicine for it so it will get better soon.

i have cold sore on my nose. naturally, asher did it. also, somebody call an ambulance. AND my sweet little stinker who loves to be rough and rowdy is also sympathetic, considerate, and very concerned about my burger.

Monday, November 4, 2013

pumpkins

me: ok, boys! i've got the pumpkins cut in half now i need your help. can y'all take these spoons and scoop out all the insides and seeds. you can put them in this bowl.
asher: uhhh, i'm thinking this is kind of a yucky job.
me: yeah, it is, but it's worth it because when we're done we'll get to cook the pumpkin AND the seeds!
asher: yeah, but can i just do a different job? this one is gross.
me: ok, well, nate can you be my scooper?
nate: YEAH!!!
me: ok, but you have to put the seeds in the bowl, not throw them across the dining room.

asher wouldn't try the yucky job of pumpkin cleaning at all. nate got so involved that pumpkin seeds and guts were flying across the dining room. i'm not sure why i thought this would be an fun family activity...


mom life

bryan: your hair looks really pretty today, wifey.
me: thanks! i dried it today!
bryan: haha!
me: oh! and i washed it too!

tis a rare occasion when my hair is both washed and blown dry. it's sweet of the husb to notice when i make the extra effort to do both.

Friday, October 25, 2013

wake up call

nate: mooooom! is it time to wake up?
me: nooooooo.
nate: but it's 6 clockin' hours, mom!
me: huh?
nate: i said it's 6 clockin' hours!
me: ok. wake me up at 7 clockin' hours.
* he flops around on top of me for a few minutes
nate: mom! i fink it's time to get up!
me: nooooo.
nate: but it's 11 10 hours.
me: wake me up in a few more.
nate: MOM! it is 7 hours and dat means it's time to wake up.

this conversation went back and forth for about 100 clockin' hours until i finally got up with that cute little stinker.

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

mittens

bry: are you pulling chicken out of that old soup for mittens?
me: yes, i am.
bry: well, that is ridiculous.
me: husb, wooing untamed animals can be a tedious business.
bry: and it is the passion of your heart. you know that if you keep feeding that cat then eventually you're going to stop seeing those bunnies hop out of the bushes...
me: husb, the plan is to woo mittens all the way inside. then we can sit at the window and watch the bunnies together.
bry: oh boy.
me: i was worried about that kitty getting too cold last night.
bry: elise. it's an animal with fur. it can endure the cold.
me: i considered leaving a box with some old towels on the porch...
bry: oh, yeah? why don't you just leave the garage open?
me: well, i thought about that too, but then i didn't want any other critters getting in.
bry: oh my gosh.

we have a stray cat that slinks around our yard. i feed it leftovers in hopes that i can win it over. so far it just stares at me through the window and then darts away. slow progress. we've already named it though so i feel like we're going places with that cat. it's meant to be.

sardines

asher: mom? why did that man say that the sardines have no escape?
me: well, because between the dolphins and the sharks and the birds, they can't get away.
asher: but why can't they get away?
me: because they're going to be eaten.
*he hides his face and burst into tears
me: what's wrong, bud?
asher: I DON'T WANT THE DOLPHINS TO EAT THE SARDINES!
me: oh, darling. i know that's hard to think about. it makes me sad to think about animals being killed sometimes too. but if the dolphins didn't eat the fish, then the dolphins would die.
asher: BUT WHY CAN'T THE DOLPHINS JUST EAT SEAWEED?!?!
me: hmm, that's a good question. did you know that some people believe that before adam and eve sinned that no animals killed others for food? everything ate plants and fruits. so maybe when Jesus comes back and makes all things new and good again, dolphins will eat seaweed.
asher: WHY ISN'T JESUS HERE YET?!
me: well, no one knows, bud. what we do know is that God knows the perfect time for Jesus to come back and so we can trust in Him for the right timing.
asher: BUT I WISH ADAM AND EVE DIDN'T SIN SO THE SARDINES COULD LIVE! I JUST LOVE THOSE SARDINES AND I NEED THEM NOT TO DIIIIIIIIIE!
me: i know, bud. i wish adam and eve didn't sin so we didn't have to worry about sin or death at all, but that makes us want Jesus and love Him even more knowing that God fixed our sin problem when Jesus was here the first time. AND it gives us so much to be excited about and hope for when He comes back again.
asher: yeah...i need to go pray right now. i need to go talk to God about those sardines.
me: ok, bud.
*he walks into his bedroom.

who knew that watching a show about the ocean would generate an opportunity to share the gospel? praying that asher's sweet heart, compassion, and prayers for the salvation of sardines would one day mature into a passion for sharing the gospel with human beings.

love that boy.

Saturday, October 19, 2013

brain food

bryan: asher, would like milk or juice to drink?
asher: i'll take the brain food. milk, please.
me: where did you learn that? 
asher: in class, mom. we were learning about our bodies and the teacher told us milk was good for our brains. SO, i'll have the brain food.

yay for homeschool co-op!

Monday, October 14, 2013

family pictures

me: husb! look at all these beautiful pictures!
bry: they are really good.
me: how did she get so many when our tot was so grumpy?
bry: i don't know. she did a good job. look at that one. it looks like nate and i are having a tender moment, but i'm pretty sure i'm having a "talk" with him because he was screaming and refusing to take any more pictures.
me: haha! it looks real sweet though.

my sweet husb had many a "talk" with our little nater on picture day. it went something like this,

bry: nate, you're part of this family and you need to be in these pictures.
nate: NOOOOOOOOO, I'MMMMMM NOOOOOOOT!!!!
bry: well, you're going to be because this is really important to your mother.
me: daddy doesn't like getting dressed up and taking pictures either, tot, but he's doing a really good job.
nate: NOOOOOOOOO! *runs away screeching*

and, yet, michele wallace managed to capture such sweet shots. miraculous.

Saturday, October 12, 2013

poop

asher: i think i have to poop! well, no i think i can hold it...
me: asher! just go poop! that's the second time you've said you had to and then decided to hold it.
asher: ugh. i hate pooping. it's so boring.
me: asher, it's a necessary part of life. just do it.
asher: what happens if i don't?
me: your poop backs up in you and you go into septic shock and we take you to the hospital so they can pump it out of you!
asher: pump it out? with what?
me: a tube. right in your b-hole.
asher: ew.
me: i know. so go poop.
asher: ok!

that is what happens when you don't poop, right? also, i am laughing so hard at the word b-hole. kudos to bry for making that part of our family vernacular.

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

sad eyes

me: ok, nater, let's clip your nails.
nate: *wailing* nooooooo! pwease, mom! noooo! pwease, don't cwip deeeem!
me: nate, you've got raptor claws. it has to be done.
nate: but wook at my face, mom.
me: ok...
nate: can you see my sad eyes?
me: yes.
nate: i have sad eyes because you're trying to cwip my nails.
me: oh, boy.

his sad eyes were even more piercing than his raptor claws. sigh.

Thursday, September 19, 2013

darling

me: hey, can i hold your hand, bud?
asher: sure! you can hold my hand anytime you want, darling.
me: oh, wow. thank you, asher.
asher: you're laughing because i said darling?
me: i'm laughing because you're so cute.
asher: well, i'll let you hold my hand because that means i love you.
me: you're so good to me.

we have some moments that i'd rather not dwell on, so they don't get blogged. however, it's sweet moments like these with my boy that i want to remember for always.

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

burgers

nate: hey, mom!
me: yeah, nater?
nate: wook at dis!
*he holds up his finger
me: whatcha got?
nate: i caught a burger on my finger!
me: oh, nice. a booger.

he calls them burgers. gross.

tights

asher: mom, what's on your legs?
me: those are called tights, bud.
asher: is it paint?
me: nope. they're a piece of clothing.
asher: if i touch it will it get on me?
me: no, babe. it's not paint. you can touch them.
asher: wow, they're soft.
me: yep. they help keep my legs warm.
asher: so they're like pants?
me: kind of. except i have to wear a skirt or dress over them.
asher: *cups his hand and whispers* so people can't see your privates.
me: exactly.
asher: well, i think the other ladies at church are going to like those tights.
me: thanks, asher.

sweet boy. takes after his daddy.

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

allergic

me: nate, do you want some peanuts?
nate: yeah!
asher: not me! i don't like them.
me: that's ok. you don't have to eat them.
asher: my teacher at the bell church asked me if it was okay for me to eat peanuts and i told her it wasn't, but it's really ok for me eat them. i told her it wasn't because i don't like them.
me: so you told her you weren't allowed to have them?
asher: yeah. i just decided to trick her and tell her i was allergic.
me: woah, bud. you shouldn't pretend to be allergic to something when you're not. it's ok just to say, "no, thank you. i don't like them." did you know that sometimes cookies and candy have peanuts in them? if they think you're allergic and will get sick then they won't let you eat that either.
asher: yeah, i know. i was just tricking.
me: well, you were lying to your teacher, bud. who was it?
asher: uhh, it was jackson's mom.
me: ok, babe. next time you see ms. ashley you need to apologize and tell her the truth, please.
asher: oh, alright. i'll tell her i can eat peanuts, i just don't want to.

shewf. good thing that stinker said his prayers last night.

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

outside

nate: mom, i will lay here is da grwass. you get up and go shoot dos balls in da goalf.
me: why do i have to get up? i can't lay here with you?
nate: mom, i told you to go shoot dos balls in the goalf.
me: geez...
nate: *he looks at me, raises his eyebrows, removes one hand from behind his head and points to the goal, i mean goalf, from his comfortably reclined position in the grass.

that boy means business. basketball shooting business.

prayers

asher: dear God, thank You for the Lord that you sent us, but i got something to ask ya. can You just make us obedient and help not to do bad things even if we think they're fun? just help to obey and do what's right. amen.
nate: *yelling* AND JESUS DIED ON DA CRWOSS AND TAKED OUR SINS AWAY!

family devotion time is a fun way to end our days.

Saturday, September 7, 2013

halloween

bryan: ok, so do you need jumbo sticks or regular sticks or jumbo colored sticks? there's a whole wall of craft sticks here.
me: um, i think just the plain jumbo. i don't need fancy colors.
bryan: just so you know, i'm really out of my element here at michael's, but they have this huge halloween display that i'm loving. there's a carousel with ghosts and junk.
me: oh...cool...

my husb loves weird halloween decorations. the creepier and tackier, the better. thankfully, he's not in charge of decorating or we would have fake spider webs and skeletons and, apparently, ghost carousels.

nater joke

nate: hey! why did the bird get da paper?
me: um, why?
nate: because da bird got da paper!
*ridiculous, over exaggerated laughter
me: wow. what a jokester. good one, nate!

clever, that one.

Wednesday, September 4, 2013

dream

bryan: did you hear what asher was saying this morning?
me: huh?
bryan: he came and got in the bed at about 6 this morning and he was telling me to turn around because the spiders were behind me.
me: ohhh, yeah. i did hear him saying that.
asher: i was dreaming, guys. i was just dreaming.
me: about spiders?
asher: well, i was dreaming that me and jackson and julian were playing here and these big ol' bunglebees were chasing us so we ran and hid under your bed. then, my leg was still sticking out and i didn't know it, but the bunglebees saw it and they found us. so we ran out into the living room and there was a kid guard standing there to protect us. it was a kid guard, mom, not an adult one.
me: ok.
asher: so we were standing in here with the kid guard and then there were these big spiders crawling all over the window outside and they were trying to get in. that's when i was telling daddy to turn around and look because those spiders were about to be crawling on his back. and then i woke up and the dream was done.
me: wow. was that scary dreaming about big spiders and bees trying to get you?
asher: no, mom. it was just a dream about big bugs.

how is a dream about getting chased by huge bugs not scary? maybe it was the guard. that kid must have been really doing his job. also, i LOVE that he still says bungle bee. here's hoping we make it to 16. 

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

dearest husb

dearest husb,

since i'm sure you're wondering how our first day of preschool at home went, i thought i would put an end to your suspenseful suffering and provide you with an update.

as you know, our day was supposed to start with a treasure hunt for school supplies (thanks for helping me hide those), however the hunt was postponed on account of nate pooping his pants. i don't blame him though since i did tell him to stay in the box castle with asher until i called for them. he followed those directions of staying put excellently. when we realized he was making his own treasure in his pants, he was rushed to the potty to finish up his business. asher was very disgruntled, after being holed up in the stinky castle with his brother, to find that he was going to have to wait for nate to finish on the potty before he could start searching for supplies.
asher: uhhhhh! why is he taking so long to poop?
me: asher, you can't rush pooping, bud. he's just gotta take his time and get it all out.
asher: i know, but he's taking foreeeeevvveeer!
me: well, babe. try to be patient.
asher: why do i have to wait on him?
me: because you're going to be a treasure hunting team! it'll be more fun together!
nate: cuz i'm pooping, ashwer!!!
asher: ugh. i know, nate. i know. just hurry up.
after we wrapped up potty time, the treasure hunt commenced! the boys had so much fun finding the glue, pencils, scissors, and crayons and putting them in our homemade treasure box.

then, we started our school lessons learning about how God's word is a treasure. we introduced the letter X by taping a big letter on the floor with painter's tape. then we jumped, skipped, walked, and tiptoed across practicing the letter X sound while we went. we did lots of other activities with the letter X, but there is one i felt the need to warn you about. i thought bringing out trays of salt to practice writing the letter X sounded like a really fun idea. you know, it's sensory writing practice. it was going really well until our sons' mighty imaginations turned the salt into snow... and then they needed tractors to move the snow... and then the tractors couldn't possibly leave the snow in one place because they were there to do some work...and the work involved pushing the snow into the floor so the boys could make snow angels. it may have gotten a little salty up in here. and i may have thought that was okay because i could just sweep it up. however, it turns out that it may be pretty difficult to sweep and/or vacuum up salt. who knew, right? so try not to grumble while you are stepping on tiny grains of salt that have been scattered all over our house and will remain there until the end of time. just think about how much fun your boys had practicing their letter writing...and their snow plowing. OR just keep your socks on so it's not as noticeable.

and while i'm already on a roll with the confessing of supervised messes that occurred today, there's something else you should probably know. as i was trying to sweep/ vacuum/ scoop up by hand all of the salt, i sent the boys to play in the backyard. good, innocent, energy emptying time outside. yeah, except remember the other day when i kind of taught them how to turn on the outside faucet so that they could fill up those plastic cups and throw water on each other? yeah, that right there bit me in the butt today.
asher: mom!!
me: yeah, bud?
asher: nate looks like a brown batman!
me: huh? ok! i'll be there in a minute. let me finish sweeping.
asher: ok! it's cool! he's just got mud all over his face!
me: WHAT?!
apparently, if you let that outside faucet run it makes an awesomely filthy mud puddle in which our children felt the need to roll in. and lay down in. and throw mud from. and paint the side of the house with such mud. and then run screaming with their swamp thang selves when it was time to get rinsed off and hauled to the tub. no, i mean i literally had to catch nate with a towel and haul him to the the tub. it's a miracle that there isn't mud splattered all throughout our house. or maybe there is and i just choose to be blind because i have cleaned up enough mud to meet my mud cleaning quota for the whole year in one day. this one, very first, filthy day of preschool at home.

so here are the two things i learned from school today:
1.) homeschooling boys is clearly going to be an adventure. a messy, stock-up-on-the-cleaning-supplies-now, not-quite-what-i-planned adventure.
2.) i need an iphone to document such adventures. get on that, husb.

love,
your happy to stay at home and clean up life's messes wifey

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

jerk

bryan: alright, wifey, i'm gonna go ahead and leave. i want to have time to call that guy back on the way there and talk to him if i need to.
me: ok, husb. have fun on your bromance date.
bryan: i will! love you.
me: love you too. oh, and don't be a jerk and stay out until like 2 in the morning and not even bother to call or text or communicate to me in any way that you are still living, k?
bryan: i know. that would be a real a-hole thing to do.
me: for real. tell me about it. *sigh and slow head shake* some people.

my sweet husb is kind and thoughtful and would never do something so inconsiderate. his wifey, on the other hand, may have left for a women's event at church at 6:45 p.m. and stayed until 1:30 a.m. until finally her worried husb called her friend, who happened to be one of the other two women also standing in the empty church parking lot chatting it up to all hours of the morning, to check on the status of his significant other. i tell you, some people are real a-holes.

Saturday, June 8, 2013

everything

nate: mom, are we gowing slwower now? can we go slwow now?
me: we are going slower, babe. we got off of the interstate so we're going the slower speed limit now.
nate: ashewr, we're gowing slower now. we're not on da inewrstate.
asher: nate, i know. i know everything.
nate: but we're going slwow now.
asher: nate! i know! i went to preschool so i know everything now!

although asher did go to an awesome preschool last year, i don't think he's learned everything quite yet.

Friday, June 7, 2013

chess

asher: mom, i would like to play chess. it's kind of like checkers, but it's not. it has better pieces to play with.
nate: can i pway chess, mom?
asher: *scoff* no, nate! chess is really, really hard. you can't just play it!
nate: pweeeeeease, ashewr?
asher: no, nate. my dad already taught me how to play and he didn't teach you yet because it's so hard, but i can play fine.

regular 4 1/2 year old chess master up in here y'all.

squirrels

asher: mom? is it summer now?
me: yeah, pretty much.
asher: ok, good. now it's time for us to gather up stuff and start burying it in the house for winter.
me: huh?
asher: *he enunciates and speaks louder* IT'S TIME TO BURY STUFF IN THE HOUSE, MOM. LIKE SQUIRRELS. FOR WINTER. *he sighs*

excuse me, sir. i was not aware that our family had adopted the foraging habits of squirrels.

dr. mom

asher: mom, you're a great doctor.
me: well, thanks, bud.
asher: you just washed our ant bites and then put appointment on them and they feel so much better.
me: i'm so glad, bud.
*he squeezes me tight
asher: you're the best doctor i've ever had!

by appointment, he means ointment. and by he's-so-cute-i-could-squitch-him, i mean he's so cute, i literally squitched him.

worm rescue

asher: mom? why are all these worms out?
me: well, it rained a lot this morning and now we've got the sprinkler out so the ground is very wet. worms don't do so well in really wet ground.
asher: oh! we need to move them to a better location!
me: well, we'll have to turn the sprinkler off if you want to do that...
asher: ok! get that sprinkler turned off! i'll keep an eye on the worms!
me: alright.
*i turn the sprinkler off
asher: mom, can you help me gather them up?
me: yeah, bud. here's a handful.
asher: ok, i'm gonna go find a better, drier place for them!
me: sounds good, bud. i'll keep looking for more.
asher: nate! get over here and get some worms! we gotta find a better location for them!

our little emergency worm relocation team led by captain asher was moving handfuls of worms at a time to drier ground. i'm so thankful for asher john's compassionate heart, even when it's for slimy, half-drowned worms.

lazy

me: are you going back to the bathroom before you go to sleep?
bryan: uhh, why? cause if you need me to get you something, then i'll forgo brushing my teeth and just go to sleep.
me: you hates me.
bryan: haha! i'm just kidding. whatcha need, baby?
me: one of those face wipe thingys...
bryan: no. i am not bringing you one of those things so you can swhipe your face in bed and then throw it over me into the floor to be left there for an undetermined amount of time.
me: huuuuuuuusb!
bryan: no, wifey. get out of bed and go wash your filthy face and then throw that junk in the trashcan.
me: huuuuusb! you do hates me.
bryan: go.
me: ok, ok. i'm gooooing!
*i climb out of my snuggly, warm bed.
me: it's pretty remarkable that you knew exactly what i was going to do with that wipey. it definitely was gonna get thrown over you into the floor...

he knows me so well. he also hates doing totally reasonable things for his lazy wife. sigh.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

homeschool

asher: mom, i think we should start my homeschool.
me: ok, sure. i've got some stuff pulled together.
asher: yeah, let's start with confernation and suction metals. then we'll do story time and math.
me: uhhh, ok.
asher: and math parties.
me: math parties?
*he cups his hand around his mouth and whispers
asher: math parties is when you have parties and do lots of math. it's fun. you'll like it.
me: well, alright then.

story time? check. i am all about story time and children's literature and yadda, yadda, yadda. someone's gonna have to help a momma out with confernation (must be a new subject) and suction metals (it sounds so legit that i want to believe he didn't just make it up on the spot) and, perhaps the most dreaded of all, MATH PARTIES?!?! how dare he combine something as wonderful as a party with something as frustrating as math...how dare he.

Saturday, May 18, 2013

facebook status

bryan: you thought my comment about formaldehyde in johnson & johnson soap was funny enough to post on facebook?
me: funny enough for Facebook, but not funny enough to make the blog cut...
bryan: oh, wow. i'll try harder next time.
me: speaking of the blog, you didn't think my new posts today were funny enough to even like on facebook?!
bryan: wifey, i don't like anything on facebook.
me: you are so bad at interacting with your wifey via facebook. sheesh. i need you to like everything i ever post ever.
bryan: you crazy, boo.

*later this conversation happened on my facebook wall-
Wow, it's so amazing how much I like all of your facebook postings...(Does this cover all future postings that I probably will forget to like?)
Unlike · 
me:

he DOES love me, y'all. sometimes he just forgets how important marital communication via facebook is...

Friday, May 17, 2013

robbers

me: asher, this is just a story. the bad guys in this book say some really ugly things to other people. the ugly people say ugly things. we want to be careful not to treat others the way these guys do so we don't want to repeat the ugly things they say.
asher: yeah, they say ugly things like robbers say ugly things.
me: ok. yeah.
asher: yeah, cause robbers say things like, "i'm gonna take all of your stuff and even your whole house!" and that's ugly. we shouldn't say that.
me: no, we shouldn't.
asher: yeah. and the robbers live in their little robber houses so they think they need to steal other people's big ol' houses, but they don't.
me: no, they don't.
asher: yeah, cause that's being greedy.
me: yes, it is.
asher: they should just go to the robber store and buy a bigger robber house with their robber money instead of stealing.

asher watched part of the movie matilda on tv the other night, but it was time for him to go to bed before it was over. i told him i would get the book for him at the library so he could see how the story ended. however, some of the villians in the book say some really ugly things to each other and i wanted to make sure he knew he shouldn't speak to people the way the bad guys did. i'm not sure why we started talking about robbers and their practices, but there you have it.

in summation, if you're considering a life of robbery in which you wish to steal another person's entire house, please choose to not be so ugly and greedy and instead take yourself down to your local robber store where you can purchase your own robber house with your robber money. thank you for your consideration.

skateboard

asher: mom? i'm gonna skateboard to bed!
me: ok, sure.
*he pretends to ride a skateboard to his bedroom
asher: mom? can i sleep with my skateboard?
me: yep.
*he makes a big scene about heaving his imaginary skateboard into his bed
asher: whew. i have two so it's pretty hard. one of them has flames on it and is really fast. the other one is fluffy and doesn't have wheels so that i can sleep on it.
me: oh, cool.
asher: i can also do some really cool tricks on them.
me: sounds awesome, bud. i would love to seem them in the morning.

somebody watched Xgames skateboarders on the half pipe before bed...

hitting

asher: naaaaaate! stop it!
nate: i wanna see, ashewr!!!
asher: naaaaate! don't hit me!
nate: uh! stop it, ashewr!
asher: mooooooooom! nate is hitting me!
me: bud, i'm about to dry my hair. work it out amongst yourselves. hit him back if he won't stop.
asher: ok! nate i'm gonna hit you back if you don't stop hitting me!
*i hear a slap and anticipate a crying nater tot, but instead i hear...
nate: awwww, ashewr. i wove you.
asher: nate, why are you hugging me? i hit you back.
nate: but i wove you, brover.
asher: ok, ok i love you too.

bry and i joke that nate's love language is wrestling. he is so physical and always hitting or jumping or somersaulting or pushing. apparently, asher was speaking his love language when he hit nate back because instead of crying, the tot just needed to pause and express his admiration for his brother.

also, i realize that you guys are in awe of my wonderful parental guidance. i'm sure the phrases "work it out amongst yourselves" and "hit him back if he won't stop" are in the awesome parenting handbook. sometimes a momma just gotta do what a momma gotta do to get things done. don't hate.

Thursday, May 9, 2013

e-mail

bryan: so, when i'm problem solving, i'm on a computer all day and i can get e-mails. so hit me up, boo.
me: OMMMMGGG! WE CAN TOTALLY E-MAIL FLIRT NOW!!! i love you, hot stuff.
bryan: shoot, i know. you gonna e-mail me a hot picture that i can make my desktop background? of the whole family, of course.
me: sure. nuuuudey styyyle coming up!
bryan: i hope they aren't looking at these e-mails...i love you.
me: hahahahaha! i hope they are!

of course, i did no such thing as send such a picture, nor would i ever, but it is funny to think about some amazon executive taking the time to read our ridiculous e-mails.

rap star

me: what are you doing with the cat toy, asher?
asher: it's a lasso, mom.
me: oh. it looks more like a whip, i think.
asher: no, mom, it's a lasso. see? 
* he throws it at a tree branch and the string wraps around. 
me: ohhh, ok. 
asher: i'm a cowboy with a lasso. 
me: i see that now. cool, dude.
*much to my surprise and pleasure, he starts rapping
asher: i'm a cowboy with my lasso. i'm bringing things to tha ground cuz my lasso's jus ra ra ra wrapping around. i'm gonna lasso a cat and bring it downtown to tha ground. i'm gonna lasso a cow and bring it downtown to tha ground. i'm a cowboy with a lasso and it's ra ra ra wrapping around and bringing things to tha ground! 
me: wow. excellent. 

i promise you, i am not making this up. i know you're really impressed, but he won't be giving autographs until he can sign the letters of his name in the right order, so contain yo'self. i hope he's one of those sweet rap stars who takes his mom with him as his date to the award shows. i'll say really embarrassing stuff during his red carpet interviews like, "yeah, when he spit his first rhyme about lassoing a cat, i knew he was going places in this business." 

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

the courage of mothers pt.1

asher: mom, when you were little like me you didn't have any babies in your belly.
me: nope.
asher: but then you got big and you met daddy. i was up in heaven with God, but then He put me in your tummy and started sewing me together and then when He was done i came out of that.
*he gestures towards my stomach and the regions below. we've had a vague and age appropriate conversation about how babies are born,  and although he's not quite sure of the details, he knows that babies come from the tummy and beyond.
me: yes! when it was time, God formed you exactly as he wanted you to be and then he choose you to be our baby boy. daddy and i are so very thankful for you, bud.

bryan and i believe that every child, from conception, is tenderly and purposefully formed by an intentional God. we're trying to teach our children to value life as much as we do. we're working to teach them that God's plans and timing are lovely and good and that He doesn't make mistakes.

that being said, our first two pregnancies happened so easily and unexpectedly that, if we were inclined to believe differently, we might call them accidents. a missed pill in a forgetful moment or an empty box of condoms in the heat of the moment, and a gestation period later, we had a tiny bundle of joy. this is exactly what happened both times. we never tried or agonized or planned. we just did what married people do. not only were our conceptions easy, but our pregnancies were also a breeze. no puffy swelling, no excruciating back pain, no gestational diabetes, no pre-term labor. and as for labor and delivery, well, naturally it was painful, but there were no abnormal complications or problems.

HOWEVER, although our 2 pregnancies were easy peasy from start to finish, we were no strangers to how complicated and devastating a pregnancy could be. during the roughly 3 years that bry and i were making and having our two boys (they are 23 months apart), some of our dearest friends- you know the ones who we call friends, but they are much more like family-were going through baby-related struggles that we had never had to face.  tragedies like infertility and miscarriage were things we were walking through with our friends. we cried with them. we prayed with them. we tried to give them hope. but, let's be honest, how can the easy peasy baby makers who had never encountered the slightest threat of complication truly relate to such pain and loss?

truthfully, we couldn't. oh, i tried. don't think i didn't try. as a mother of two healthy boys i tried to imagine what i would feel if one of my children were suddenly taken away. if they were supposed to be in my arms, but they weren't. if their seat at our table suddenly was empty, when i knew it should be filled. if we had already chosen names weighted with so much meaning and promise to simply have them left hanging in the air with no child to attach them to. i tried so hard to empathize and comfort. mostly i just tried to listen. to give these beautiful women whom i loved so much a chance to let their pain out and to deal with their broken hearts and crushed hopes safely and without condemnation.

i did not do it perfectly. i know i said some things that were not what they needed to hear. i know i unintentionally added to their hurt even while i was trying to help heal. praise Jesus for grace. i think the most important thing i learned from walking through dark places with dear ones (not that it matters if i learned a thing since it was not about me or my hurt, but about them and theirs) is that these beautiful, brave friends were not just women who had lost an amniotic sac filled with tissue and blood. these women were MOTHERS who had lost their CHILDREN. they had hopes for their babies just as i had for mine, only theirs had been crushed and lost and taken too soon.

as i said, bry and i sincerely believe that our God never makes mistakes. even in the midst of tragedy and loss, He has not messed up, nor has He forgotten. it's hard to understand. even harder to have the faith to believe it's true. in the midst of such devastation God proves Himself faithful and good.

so here's to the brave mamas who stand beside me in the ranks of motherhood with empty arms and crushed hopes. may you find that-

The Lord is close to the broken hearted and saves those who are crushed in Spirit. Psalm 34:18


GraceLaced Mondays

Thursday, April 25, 2013

superhero

asher: moooooom! maaaaaammmmmaaaaa! moooooom!
me: asher, daddy and i are talking. if i'm talking to someone else and you have something to say, you need to say excuse me and give me time to respond.
asher: ok...
*a few minutes later
asher: mooooooooom! mooooooooom!
*i ignore him
asher: oh, i mean, excuse me, mom?
me: yes, asher?
asher: did you know that x-ray vision is when you can use your eyes to see through things.
me: yeah...
asher: yep.
me: ok.

a worthy interruption indeed. he must have had superheroes on the brain because a few hours after he had gone to bed, he woke up crying and still half asleep-

me: what's wrong, bud?
asher: *crying* i just...i just...i really want to be a superhero!
me: ok, babe.
asher: it's just...i don't like it when i don't have the time to do superhero things!
me: ok, well, maybe you can be a superhero tomorrow.
asher: ok...

there's always tomorrow to hone your superhero skills, my boy.

peace

papa: where you going, gangee?!
gangee: inside to use the bathroom, papa!
papa: no! you can't go!
asher: *sigh* gangee, just go. we'll take care of papa.
gangee: haha! thanks, asher.
asher: we'll take care of papa. you go take your rest. have some peace.

sweet boy trying to hold back his papa's aggravations. good luck with that, son.

Thursday, April 18, 2013

GG's birthday

me: ok, boys. today is GG's birthday so we're going to call her and sing happy birthday.
asher: ok!
nate: ok!
*i call GG's home number
me: it's ringing now. if she doesn't answer, then we'll just leave her a message. ready?
*the machine beeps
asher, nate, and me: happy birthday to you! happy birthday to you! happy birthday-
nate: to yooooou!
me: to GG. we're singing to GG, nate.
nate: oh, yeah. ok, to GG.
me: happy birthday, GG! we love you!
asher: we love you, GG!
nate: we wanna eat cake wif you, GG!

any time someone in our family has a birthday, my sweet grandma calls and sings to them. the boys and i made sure to return the favor. although, and i won't name any names, some of us seem a little more excited about cake than anything else.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

store

asher: ok, mom! my store is open!
me: alright, babe!
asher: wouldn't you like to buy something?
me: of course. how much does this swing cost?
asher: um, that's 3 grass and 3 flowers.
me: ok. sounds like a fair price. why don't you ask GG on the phone if she wants to order something from your store?
asher: well, she'll just have to drive over here and buy something herself.
me: what?! you don't deliver?
asher: i can't deliver, mom. 
me: why not?
asher: because if i run away to GG's house, you guys will give me a spank!

touché, sir. 

this morning, asher gathered up all the toys outside, arranged them on the picnic table, and then opened up shop. we discovered he's a pretty shrewd business man, charging as much as 5 grass and 3 flowers for a single item. he also got some calculator practice as he added up all his earnings. apparently, if you add up enough grass and flowers you get $25. he even showed off his marketing skills in order to win over a new customer:

asher: hi, GG. don't you want to drive over here and buy something from my store? i have lots of stuff. you can buy my shark bicycle helmet. i decided i'm done with it and i'm gonna sell it. *he looks at me and whispers* i'm just pretending, mom. i'm not really gonna sell it. 

Saturday, April 6, 2013

family wrestle

*in the midst of wrestling with bryan
asher: dad, you're the goodest fighter ever!
bryan: the goodest ever?!
*he snatches off asher's pants
bryan: i'm so good i just wrestled your pants off!
asher: awwww, i want my pants back.
bryan: ok, the only reason i literally wrestled you out of your pants is because it's time to take a bath.
asher: oh, ok. let's pull all our clothes off and have a naked family wrestle!
bryan: uhhh, that's taking it a little too far, bud.
nate: yeah!
*nate drops his pants
bryan: ok, boys. it's bath time.

i assure you that we do not (nor do we intend to) participate in naked family wrestle time.

pretty

nate: what's dat, mom?
me: these are new shoes that daddy let me get for my birthday.
nate: oh, ok.
me: i have to try them on.
*i slide them on my feet.
nate: oh! you wook pwetty, mom.
me: oh, thank you, nate.
nate: yeah, you wook so pwetty!

little boys listen to the sweet things their daddies say. i'm so thankful for a husb who sets such a fine example for our boys.

dandelion

asher: i found this dandelion for you.
me: oh, thank you!
*he sniffs it
asher: it smells like the sun!
me: you think so?
*he sniffs in the direction of the sun
asher: yep. smells just the same.
me: oh, wonderful. it looks like the sun, doesn't it?
asher: yep. here ya go. put it in your flower collection.

i could have a whole collection if i kept every sweet, flowery gift that boy has given me. what a treasure he is.

Friday, April 5, 2013

boogs

asher: i want a treat.
me: uh, wait a minute. is that a booger stuck to your tooth?
asher: no...
me: have you been eating your boogers again?
asher: NO!
me: i'm pretty sure that's a booger on your tooth.
asher: no, it's not.
me: i believe you've already been eating some treats, sir.

that child cannot stop with the booger eating. i'm trying to break the habit without being too hard on him. i don't want to make him feel like he's a disgusting freak for chewing on a boog every now and again since i'm pretty sure every kid ever has tasted their own boogers at least once before, BUT it is pretty darn gross. however, he did tell us once that they taste like chocolate. i'm just saying, if his boogers taste like chocolate, can you really blame him?

ok, but seriously, how do you put a stop to the eating of the boogs?!

daddy

bryan: look at those little seals, nate.
nate: yeah! der's da daddy and da babies!
bryan: yeah. and here's some penguins.
nate: oh! wook at dat daddy and da baby!

bryan and the boys were looking at pictures of adorable arctic babies last night before bed. it seems to me that most children assume when seeing adult animals with their babies that the adult is the mama. not so with nate. he always assumes the adult animal is the daddy. which is not surprising if you know him because he is a daddy's boy through and through. of course those baby animals are hanging out with their dad. that's definitely where he would be.

tree doctor

me: oh, look, asher! this cherry tree is sprouting new tiny branches!
asher: oh, cool!
me: yep. that means it's a healthy tree. it has lots of new green branches.
asher: yeah, but what happens when it isn't healthy and doesn't have new branches? where does it go to the doctor?
me: um, well, there aren't doctors for trees, but sometimes there are some sprays you can put on them, kind of like medicine, that helps prevent bugs and mold from killing them.
asher: yeah, but why do flies and bugs and moles want to kill the trees?
me: i don't think flies and moles want to kill the trees, but some bugs like termites like to eat the wood inside the trees.
asher: yeah, but what happens if they eat the wood?
me: if they eat away too much the tree will die.
asher: oh, no. i guess we'll have to get that medicine for it then.

at the time of this conversation, i was really confused as to why asher was asking about moles killing trees. later, i realized that he misunderstood 'mold' for 'moles'. his concern makes so much more sense now.

Monday, April 1, 2013

soccer

me: here's your water, bud.
asher: thanks, mom.
me: hey, when you're kicking the ball with a partner you need to try to make sure you kick it to her.
asher: mom, i was.
me: ok, well you could try to help her by not kicking it over her head or really far away from her.
asher: yeah...
me: you know how me and daddy talk about how in this family we're for each other and not against. how we do things to help each other and not hurt. it's kind of the same thing when you're part of a team. you want to do your best to help your team. you're for your team mates, not against them.
asher: yeah, but she wasn't keeping her eye on the ball. she wasn't getting it because she wasn't doing that.
me: ok, well next time you have a partner try to help her by kicking as close to her feet as you can.

asher is playing soccer for the YMCA this season. his team got their jerseys tonight and voted on a team name. asher tried to convince his team mates that the name should be The Blue Chickens and he stuck by his recommendation by being the only team member to vote for it. in the end, The Blue Dragons won. dragons, i think, are a little more intimidating than chickens. i hope he learns a little bit about being a team player this season. about being for his team.

on the way home, as we talked about the team name and jerseys, he informed us:

asher: i hope next year we can get red shirts. then we can be the red roosters.
me: yeah, that would be a good name. maybe next year.

asher's prayer

asher: dear God, thank you for my family and everything you do. please help all the people to eat enough fiber so that their poopoo doesn't hurt their booty...and so they won't have to get medicine on their booty. just help them to eat fiber. i love you. amen.

this prayer is amusing on its own. however, if you know asher's papa, then it's hilarious. afterwards, we asked him why he prayed that and he said,

asher: i just hope people eat fiber so their booties don't hurt when they poop.

eat more fiber, people. release that boy from his burden.

marriage

asher: mom, when i grow up, i will get married with you.
me: well, you won't get married with me, but you can get married when you grow up.
asher: but why can't i marry you?
me: because i'm already married to daddy and i'm already part of your family. you can't marry girls who are already married or already in your family.
asher: oh. so i can't marry gangee either?
me: no...
asher: aunt amber?
me: nope.
asher: well, who can i marry?
me: it'll probably be a girl who is your friend and then you'll fall in love and decide to get married.
asher: but i already love you, so i'll just marry you.
me: no, you'll marry another girl. like elizabeth.
asher: nooo, mom. elizabeth is a little girl. a girl has to be big like you to get married.
me: well, by the time you're ready to marry, she'll be bigger. so will you.
asher: yeah in about this many years i'll be ready to marry.
*he holds up 10 fingers.
me: uhhh, something like that.
asher: yeah, so i guess i'll just marry elizabeth.
me: you've got time to think about it, bud. why do you want to get married?
asher: can you tell me?
me: well, why were you thinking about it?
asher: i was just laying here wondering who i was gonna get married with and i thought it was gonna be you.

sweet, sweet boy.

Thursday, March 28, 2013

road trip

me: why don't we just stop at the visitor's center? it's coming up in a few miles.
bryan: no. definitely not.
me: why not?
bryan: because visitor's centers are sketchy.
me: what? why?
bryan: i don't know. they're just places that scheme to get your money.
me: husb, they don't sell anything.
bryan: exactly. why are they even there?
me: uh, for information?
bryan: still sketchy.
me: husb. i'm sure it has clean bathrooms. and the sign said it has a children's play area. and they give away free popcorn and soda!
bryan: bait, wifey. that's what you call bait. they're trying to lure you in.
me: oh. muh. gah. it is the perfect place for a family to stop and potty and stretch for minute.
bryan: sketchy schemers.
me: what does that even mean? do you think they're going to try to convince you to buy a myrtle beach time share or something?
bryan: probably.
me: where else are we going to stop?
bryan: at a gas station. we need gas anyway. we're not stopping twice.
me: ok, that's fine.
*we make a wrong turn and bry pulls into a gas station to turn around.
bryan: look, here's a gas station.
me: husb, it is in the middle of nowhere and has bars on the two windows. also, it's dirty. do they even have bathrooms?
bryan: fine, wifey. fine. we'll look for somewhere else. oh, look! it 's not just a gas station! it doubles as a liquor store!
me: go.

you want to know where we ended up stopping? bryan insisted on stopping at sparky's...whose 100,254 neon signs boasted a variety of treasures such as seashells, chocolate pecans, hotdogs, and fireworks. and the visitor's center were sketchy schemers...

*as we're pulling away
bryan: i feel like our sparky's experience isn't really complete without fireworks. don't you feel like we should grab some fireworks?
me: no. i feel like next time we're stopping at the visitor's center.
asher: NO!! FIREWORKS!
bryan: yeah, asher! that's my boy!

Saturday, March 23, 2013

ABC's

nate: oh, letters! let me look at those letters!
me: ok. which letters do you see on this page?
nate: b-o-o-k.
me: good. that spells book. what about this next page?
nate: oh! (points to a question mark on the page) that means question!
me: uhh, yes. it does. how do you know that?

nate thoroughly enjoys memorizing and recalling symbols. he can recognize all of his letters, capital and lower case. he can also recognize his numbers 1-10. and the best part is-he thinks it's fun!

apparently, he has starting learning punctuation as well, although i'm not sure from where he has learned it.

boogers

asher: (screeching from the other room) NAAAAAAATE!! STOP IT!
me: hey, asher! can you try to be kind to him? what's going on?
*nate comes dashing into the bedroom where i'm folding laundry
nate: BOOGERS!
*he sticks his finger up my nose, laughs maniacally and runs away
me: OW, TOT!
asher: he was sticking his finger in my nose trying to get boogers!
me: oh.

i suppose, sometimes, it's ok for a big brother to screech at his little brother. like when the little one is jamming his chubby toddler finger so far into the big one's nasal cavity that it temporarily impairs brain function.

Thursday, March 21, 2013

silent treatment

me: thanks for making me finally talk...
bryan: i knew that's what you were waiting on. i just let you simmer over there for a good 15 minutes because i knew you weren't going to be the first one to speak.
me: haha! at one point i thought i heard you snoring and i was getting so mad thinking that you fell asleep without making me tell you what was wrong.
bryan: what?! you rolled over and were absolutely silent at 11 at night and you would've been mad if i had fallen asleep?
me: oh, yeah. i was getting mad already just thinking you had fallen asleep.
bryan: you crazy, boo.
me: i know. i think it's ingrained in my woman DNA.
bryan: it's a little ridiculous to me that you will simmer and stew in silence for however long it takes for me to ask you what is wrong, but when i finally ask you,  your response is, "nothing. i don't know. nothing." and then it takes about another 15 minutes to get to the root of the anger.
me: i know. i agree, it is weird.  
bryan: then why do you do it? can't you just tell me why you are buttsin' me and get it over with?
me: i could, but for some reason i get some kind of sadistic pleasure from the silent treatment.

this conversation took place a few weeks ago in our bed at about 11:30 p.m. on a night when my husband should've been sleeping because he had to get up at 5:30 the next morning to go to work and provide for his ridiculous wife and adorable children. instead of getting his needed sleep, he was patiently waiting for me to be ready to resolve our conflict. i honestly cannot remember why i was angry. that tells you how important the issue apparently was.

 i share this to highlight the craziness my sweet husb has to endure in our marriage and how awesome he is for handling it with such laughter and grace. i share this to remind myself and other wifeys how ineffective, silly, and truly sadistic the silent treatment is. i share this to encourage myself to love my blessing of a husb better by not buttsin' him with silence.

also, to remind myself to resolve conflict as quickly as possible so the husb and i can have fun making out.

i mean, up. making up.

Saturday, March 16, 2013

caution

me: be careful laying right there. you might scratch yourself.
bryan: yeah, at work we have to put up caution tape in danger zones. i feel like i should be taping up your armpits right now.
me: meeeeh.

tis the season once again for regular shaving. meh.

Thursday, February 28, 2013

early mornings

me: could you hear nate screeching when he woke up this morning?
bryan: no, i can't hear anything when i'm in the shower. was he crying?
me: no, he was screeching: nooooooo! i not wanna take a naaaaaaap!
bryan: like he was mad that he had fallen asleep last night?
me: yes! he was screeching over and over...like a screech owl.
asher: mom? did you know that there is a type of owl called a screech owl?
me: yes, i did.
nate: yeah, i uh owl! hooooooo! hooooooo!
me: yes, you are an owl. a screech owl, to be exact.
nate: hoo! hoo!
asher: no, nate. that's just a regular owl. a screech owl says: screeeee! screeeee!
nate: yeah, asher. screeeee!
asher: mom? dad's phone is like a flashlight. why is he using it like a flashlight?
me: because it's so early and he doesn't want to cut on the big light because it would be way too bright.

this conversation took place at about 6:15 in the morning. as bry used the light from his cell phone to fumble around in the dark and get ready, the boys and i were snuggled down in the bed discussing the technicalities of owl calls. pretty typical morning.


Thursday, February 7, 2013

bully

bryan: look at all those fish, nate!
nate: *slaps his hand against the glass causing the fish to scatter in terror
bryan: nate, you can look at the fish, but you can't hit the glass. you're scaring them.
nate: yeah! i scare dem! *hits the glass again and laughs maniacally
bryan: nate! you can't do that!
nate: heh heh heh. i scare dem, dad.
bryan: okay, nate. you are a little fish bully. c'mon, we're going to look at the cats.

since we often frequent target, and since petsmart is right beside target, we sometimes take the boys inside to have a look around. asher likes to ooo and ahh at all the animals. nate likes to terrorize them. typical.

i'm so very thankful for boys full of very different personalities.

Monday, February 4, 2013

metallica

me: o.m.gggggg. this metallica song is still on?!
bry: wifey, all of their songs are about 12 minutes long. get over it.
me: is that so you can get in extra head banging time?
bry: i like to think it's so you can have a little recovery time to prepare your brain for some more awesome head banging during the next song.
me: i wish i could have been a fly on the wall when you were in the 8th grade sitting with your buddies in a dark room playing video games and head banging to metallica. hehehe.
bry: it's probably a good thing you didn't, because you couldn't have handled all the awesome in that room.
me: let me clarify and say that if i could see that now, it would be hilarious and endearing. if i would've seen that as a snobby, pubescent girl, i would've steered so very,very far from that room of nerdiness.
bry: you know what you would've done if you saw me simultaneously head banging and killing it playing mah vidjuh games?
me: i would've said, "like, ewww, gah-ross!"
bry: nooo, baby! you would've thrown your panties at me.
me: hahaha! you crazy, boo.

Sunday, January 27, 2013

grace and monster trucks

asher: dear God, thank you for everything You do...and for my family. i love them. please help me to grow big and strong so that next time i can go see monster trucks and i won't be scared and i will stay and watch them with my friends. i love you. amen.

we got asher tickets to the monster truck rally because we thought he would LOVE it. he and bryan went last night with some other dads and little boys from church. as you can tell from his prayer, he was very scared of the whole thing. bry said that asher was ready to go before the show even started, but bry convinced him to stay at least until it began. when the show started and asher realized just how loud the trucks were, he couldn't stand being there.

well, the whole reason we got tickets to monster jam was because we thought asher would enjoy it. when bry realized that asher was thoroughly NOT enjoying it, what did my husb do?

did he try to make asher feel guilty by telling him how much money we spent on those tickets? no.
did he tell him he was being silly and irrational for being afraid? no.
did he force him to stay and sit it out in fear? no.

my sweet husb took asher out for ice cream. bryan showed our boy grace by leaving the show, even though it had barely started, and went to get ice cream instead. when they got home, asher snuggled down in the bed between bry and me and we all watched a movie together on netflix.

ice cream, snuggles and family move night? i'll take that over monster trucks any time.

and the best part: asher LOVED it.

here's to being a family that strives to breathe grace into our children's souls every, single chance we get. and may the grace we give point them to Jesus Christ from whom all grace flows.


Saturday, January 26, 2013

Saturday, January 19, 2013

"naptime"

nate: mommy? mommy? i not take a nap...
* i hear him flopping around in his crib
nate: oh! oh, good job, nate! mommy? i frow away my socks! hmmm...bye, bye socks!
* i hear him jumping up and down in the crib
nate: mommy? where are you? i wanna watch tawains. thomas and perwcy. yeah, tawains.
*silence for about 2 seconds
nate: daddy? mommy, i wanna see daddy.
*presumably waiting for daddy to respond
nate: daaaaaddy? where are you? i wanna watch tawains, dad! thomas, dad.
*he starts to fake cry
nate: daaad? uhhhhhhuh huh huh huh! oooooooooo!
*he stops the fake cry
nate: weeeeelll, i not take a nap. guys? guys? i not take a nap!

that kid wasn't lying. never did he ever take a nap.

in the potty

nate: mooooommmmy? where aaaare you? i went pooooopoooo! but not in da pooootttty!
* i go in his room.
me: nate, i'm going to change your stinky diaper, but then you have to go back to bed. it's naptime.
nate: ok!
as i'm changing his diaper, he says
nate: i go pee pee too!
* then he starts to pee as i hurriedly cover him up with a diaper.
me: tot! wait! pee pee and poo poo go in the potty, stinker!
nate: hahaha! yeah, dey go in da potty, mom!

we haven't officially started potty training yet, but we have introduced the concept to nate. i've been trying to change his diapers in the bathroom and let him sit on the potty to try. so far, he's peed in the potty 3 times. i can't decide if it's encouraging that he knows he should be using the potty, or annoying that he thinks it's funny not to.

O potty training, thou art the bane of parental existence.

Thursday, January 17, 2013

vesuvius

me: i don't know why my face is so broken out.
bry: wifey, you have about 1 pimple.
me: you mean, 18? and not pimples, mt. vesuviuses.
bry: oh, yeah. you're right. now that i'm really looking at your face you have like 40 pimples all over the place!
me: 40 vesuviuses, husb. get it right.
bry: i believe it would be vesuvii. 40 vesuvii.
me: sigh...40 vesuvii...on my face.
bry: you're crazy.

i'm glad he still loves me even when my face is about to volcanically erupt.

Saturday, January 12, 2013

grace upon grace

asher: mom? i think i wanna climb this tree.
me: um, ok. how are you going to get up there?
asher: well, i'm not sure because i'm a little too short to reach.
*we both stare at the tree for a minute, analyzing the situation.
me: well, i could give you a boost and help you up there.
asher: yeah! ok!
*i push him up into the crook of the tree
asher: alright! now i just need to climb to the very top.
me: alright. how are you going to get there?
asher: i just need to figure out a way to get to that other branch.
me: yes, but let me tell you something about climbing trees. as the branches get smaller, they also get weaker. that means the small ones can't hold big boys up. they're only for squirrels and birds to climb on.
asher: yeah, ok. i can make it to that next big branch though. i just gotta make it to the top so that i can see the whole world! and if i fall, your job is to catch me.
me: i will certainly try to, lovey.

let me just go ahead and confess that my instinct when he asked to climb that tree was to say no. i wanted to say, "no. that tree is too big and you are too small. you could fall and get hurt." although it would've been true, i think that response would've crushed his little tree-climbing spirit.  thankfully, i've been reading a book called Grace Based Parenting: Set Your Family Free by Dr. Tim Kimmel. Dr. Kimmel has been teaching me to try to parent my children the way the Lord parents me.

grace upon grace upon grace.

it is a sweet cycle that is consistently pointing our family back to Christ. i cannot distribute grace without remembering from whom i first received it. every time the Lord uses me to breathe the sweet breath of grace into my children's souls, i pray that they understand a little more about who Christ is and what he has done.

my big boy asked me to climb a tree today. i was nervous. i didn't want to let him. but then the Lord reminded me that what Asher was asking to do was not sinful or wrong. i had no right to crush his little boy dreams of seeing the whole world from the top of a small tree. instead, my job as his parent is to show him grace by giving him a boost, guiding him on the climb, and being there to catch him if he falls.

GraceLaced Mondays

favorites

nate: wook at me, mom!
me: i see you, tot! but you shouldn't be standing on the table!
nate: but wook at me, mom!

he takes a lot of pride in scaling impossible obstacles. "look at me" and "i stuck" are two of his favorite phrases.

they usually go hand in hand.

text message

me: lurbing yewp is earsy curse yer beauterfurl... larlarlarlarlar...larlarlarlarlar...laaarlaaarlaaarlaaarlaaarlaaaaaaaaar!
bryan: i'm a little incredulous that you took the time to type that...i love you.
me: hahaha! it did take a while. it was a labor or lurb, husb.

if only you could hear me singing it...sigh.