Monday, October 31, 2011

potty chronicles

me: ok, let's go potty real quick.
asher: noooooooooo!
me: yes, let's just try. you haven't been in a while.
*we go to the potty.
me: ok! let some peepee out!
asher: nope. no way. i never have to peepee.
me: well, i think you should try.
asher: no peepee, mom.
me: ok, but we're not going anywhere until you try. you haven't even tried yet. focus and let some peepee out.
asher: mooooooooom. i don't hafta peepee! i never pee-
*he starts to pee.
asher: see? i jus tell you i have some peepee.
me: yep. you told me alright.

we have this conversation or one similar to it at least once a day.

Friday, October 28, 2011

fall festival

me: asher, did you have fun at the fall festival today?
asher: yes! da daddy drove his monster truck and pulled da hay trwailer so dat we could go and get a cute baby pumpkin!
me: yep. we got to ride the hay ride to the pumpkin patch and pick out a pumpkin! did you have fun in the bounce house?
asher: yep. i was jus bouncing! i went boing! boing! boing!
me: i saw you going boing in that bounce house. you probably would've stayed in there the whole time if i would've let you.
asher: yeah, but you tell me i gotta take turns.

we had our fall festival at BBLC yesterday. it was wonderful. asher thinks that anything bigger than our car constitutes a monster truck, therefore the toyota sequoia that was pulling the hay ride was an exciting addition to the festivities for our stinker.

Saturday, October 22, 2011

life's a musical

seriously, around here it is. bry and i enjoy spontaneously narrating the events of our daily life with original songs. today we decided to take a family trip to a FREE natural sciences museum. i deemed it a song-worthy plan. let me just say that i was at the kitchen sink when the song came upon me and bry was sitting on the couch in the living room. he could see me from about the shoulders up through the cut-out we have in the wall above our sink.

me: so excited to be going to the life museum toooodaaayy! gonna see some neat dinosaauuuurs!
bryan: *looks at me out of the corner of his eye.
me: the mcclelland family going to see some awesome dinosaurs! at the freeeee muuseeeuummm! 
*i stretch my hands over my head and bring them back down in a to-the-beat-circular motion
bryan: are you doing your heel tapping back there too? i can't see it, but i'm pretty sure that would complete this.
me: hahaha! why, yes, i am tippy tapping back here. i'm a little embarrassed that you know my signature moves so well!
* i run into the living room where bry is
me: now, let me give you the full experience. mcclelland family going to see some awesome dinosaurs!
*i explode into my very advanced arm and heel tapping dance extravaganza.
bryan: ahhh, that's better. i like how you're doing the whole show right in front of the open window so all the neighbors can enjoy too.

i apologize that i am not able to translate the beautiful rhythms and cadences of my original song. you really are missing out on a musical masterpiece. i also apologize that you can't see my signature interpretive dance moves. they're pretty impressive as well.

just so you know, asher has started to pick up on our musical tendencies. sometimes we'll tell him to do something in song format and he will reply with a song. it's fun. except for the fact that i feel like if i let him get into the habit of singing his life aloud then i have no choice but to homeschool him.

Friday, October 21, 2011


asher: mom, here. you pway wif da trwuck and i'll pway wif da car.
me: ok.
asher: hey, twuck. you wanna pway wif me?
me: sure, car! i would love to play with you.
asher: ok, what's your favorwite toy, trwuck?
me: hmmm, what's your favorite, car?
asher: my favorwite toy? my daddy.



asher: mom! i a monster!
me: oh no! not an asher monster!!
asher: yeah. um, mom? i fink you better rwun.
me: ok! let me get away from that monster!
asher: yeah, cause i prwobabwy gonna get you!
me: ahhhhh!
asher: it's ok, mom. i not a monster anymore. i asher.
me: oh, thank goodness.


we went to our friend shaana's house today to decorate halloween cupcakes with her kids. she put a pan of delicious, freshly baked cupcakes in the middle of her dining room table and then let the kids ice and decorate them as they pleased. she's thoughtful and creative like that. not to mention, she loved my family so well today simply by providing us a fun opportunity to get out of the house after our week-long bout with croup.

asher was really excited when i told him we were going to their house,
me: asher, do you want to go see ms. shaana and natalie and noah and evan?
asher: yessss! pweeeeese!
me: ok, well, let's get dressed and get our shoes on.
asher: we get to see chawna and natawee and noah and evan and kevin!
me: kevin? who's kevin?
asher: i don't know, mom. who's kevin?

asher kept referring to shaana's son, evan, as kevin when we got there. i kept correcting him, but evan said that he was ok with it because, in his words: "kevin is a pretty beast name."
this convo took place as i was helping asher decorate his cupcake,
asher: mom, can i have some more porcupines?
me: porcupines?
asher: yeah, dos right der.
*he points
me: asher, those are candy corns.
asher: yeah, candy corhns.

shaana sent us home with a bag of candy corn. asher insists, no matter how many times i tell him otherwise, that they are rightfully called porcupines.
and this one i had with shaana's daughter natalie as i was heading to shaana's bedroom to nurse nate.
me: ok, asher, i'm gonna go feed brother. if you need anything, you can ask ms. shaana.
natalie: ok, but don't get food on the bed!
me: haha! i'll be really careful.
natalie: don't you need to get his food out of his bag?
me: nope, i've got what i need. i'm going to nurse him.
natalie: but is it in his bag?
me: no, i've got it here.
*i pat my chest
natalie: (looks confused and then her eyes get really big) oh!
me: haha! yeah, i'll be back in a minute.

thanks to you, shaana, for letting us spend hours at your house today decorating treats, running all of our energy out, and eating yummy lunch! we always enjoy getting the pleasure of spending time with your sweet, silly family.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

tales from the croup

both boys have had croup this week. nate was diagnosed at the ER sunday afternoon after he woke up running a fever and wheezing that morning. we deduced from his diagnosis that asher's nasty cough was the very same virus.

amongst the cool mist humidifiers & vicks baby vapor rub, the brassy barks & the gurgily hacks, the not-feeling-so-good whines & the tired tears we've still managed to have some memorable convos.

asher: mom! wook what i've got!
me: what, bud?
*he holds out his finger and says excitedly,
asher: a big ol' boogie!! wook at dat!!
me: ewww! ok, let's get a kleenex.
asher: nope. i still got some boogies to get!
me: ok, well, let's get them out real quick. brother wants to play with you!
asher: sorry, brudder. i can't pway rwight now. i got wots of big ol' boogies to get out!

croupy congestion results in lots of big ol' boogies ripe for the toddler pickin'.
bry: wifey?
me: yes?
*he walks into the kitchen scanning the thermometer across his forehead
bry: i think i'm running a fever.
me: oh, geez.
bry: look! i'm a sizzling 98.8 degrees!
me: you're crazy. get outta my kitchen!
bry: wifey! can't a husb get some sympathy? i'm normally a cool 97.6!
me: i've already got two sick babies...i don't need another.

the husb does have a pretty bad cold. probably from the same virus that the boys have. i think he will survive it though. i'm 98.8% sure of it.
bry: *coughs
nate: *looks at bry and then fake coughs
bry: wifey, did you see that?
me: what?
bry: he did a little fake cough after he heard me cough. *coughs again
nate: *fake coughs
me: haha! *i cough
nate: *looks at me and fake coughs

this is a fun game. if nate hears someone cough then he needs to cough too. even if you can't see him, you'll hear his little fake coughs coming from across the room or behind the couch. it's pretty adorable.

Friday, October 14, 2011

dearest you,

you're my fuzzy socks when my toes are freezing.

you're my cinnabon creamer when my coffee is black & bitter.

you're my harry potter, my mr. darcy, my edward cullen, my aragorn.

you're my sunday afternoon nap.

you're my heartiest, tear-inducing laugh when i need it the most.

you're my toad. (i'm your frog.)

you're my sturdy umbrella when the rain & wet try to get the best of me.

you're my perfectly designed, decorated, and organized house.

you're my panera bread when i'm pregnant.

you're my sticky note when i can't remember anything.

you're my bubble bath at the end of the longest day.

you're my sneaky spoonfuls of chocolate chip cookie dough.

you're my good night & my good morning.

you're my forever & always.

you're my favorite.

you're my best.

i'm so glad you're mine.

and i'm so thankful you were born.

happy birthday to the most wonderfulest husb.

Thursday, October 13, 2011


bry: mom said she got me a birthday present that you're going to like too.
me: oh? ok, that's fun.
bry: yeah, i asked her if it was a gameboy and she said no.
me: oh, good. that's not something i would like.
bry: then i told her that if she's sending me a puppy that i'm gonna have to punch her in the face.
me: maybe she's sending you one of those calendars full of adorable tiny puppies!!
bry: what?! you're ridiculous...
me: you know, i would really like a puppy...
bry: shut it!
me: hahahahahahaha!

i read a quote on the ever-so-addicting pinterest that said something like, "marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life."

one of the many reasons that marriage is so dang good.


me (talking to bry): you crazy, boo.
asher: no, not crwazy. 
me: what?! daddy's not crazy?!
asher: no...jus silly. he jus rwealy silly. 

excuse me. what i meant to say was, "you jus rwealy silly, boo." 

Wednesday, October 5, 2011


asher: mom, mater trwuck is under da bed.
me: ok, can you reach him?
asher: nope. i jus can't weach him.
me: alright, i'll get him for you in just a minute.
asher: ok...
*he tries to reach the truck again then yells
asher: mater trwuck! you come here to me! vroom out from under dat bed!
*after waiting for mater to respond, he says
asher: uhh, mom? he did not vroom out. he not wistening and not obeying to me.
me: ohhh, is he being disobedient?
asher: yes!
*he yells back under the bed
asher: materrrrrrr! mate! mate! do you hear me? you get out from under dat bed!

potty snakes

asher: i gotta go poopoo!
me: ok, let's go!
*he sits on the potty & does his business
asher: mom, da poop wooks wike snakes!
me: oh, um, yeah, it does kind of looks like snakes.
asher: mom, der's anofer baby snake!
me: yep...

Saturday, October 1, 2011

sneak attack

last night, i walked into the bedroom a few minutes after bry, but didn't see him anywhere. although i didn't see him, i could, however, hear him breathing. very, i froze into the crouching-wifey-hidden-husb position: feet apart, knees bent, arms tucked in, hands on either side of my face. clearly, this is the perfect defense against sneaky husb tickle attacks and/or scare tactics. then i let him know that i'm on to him,
me: bry! i can hear you breathing!
*silence. my heart starts beating a little faster. where is he?! suddenly, he responds,
bry: um, ok. so what?
*hmmm, now i'm confused. is he just trying to throw me off?! as i'm trying to decipher his game, i hear an unexpected noise,
me: hey! are you peeing?!
bry: uh, yes. why? 
*i fall on the bed laughing
me: you're in the bathroom?! i thought...hahahaha!
bry: you thought what? 
me: i walked in here and didn't see you and the bathroom light wasn't on. i could here you breathing so i thought that you were hiding and about to get me!
bry: so you said, "i can hear you breathing?" what was that gonna do? haha! 
me: husb, i was just letting you know that i was aware of the situation. if you thought that was funny, you should've seen my stance. i was ready for you, dude. 
bry: something is wrong with you.
me: hahaha!


me: asher! daddy brought home doughnuts! yaaay!
asher: yeah! doooooughnuts!!
bryan: which kind would you like, bud?
asher: FRINKLES! i would like da one wif da frinkles!

asher really loves sprinkles.

i mean, frinkles.

brotherly love

me: asher! are you pullling your brother's hair?!
asher: ummmm, no? no, i not puwing his hair...
*he lets go of nate's hair
me: if i see that again you're getting a big spank, bud! that is not loving your brother!
asher: yeah, Jesus wove my brudder wike dis.
*he hugs nate
me: yep. Jesus loves you both. that's why you have to love each other.