mittens

bry: are you pulling chicken out of that old soup for mittens?
me: yes, i am.
bry: well, that is ridiculous.
me: husb, wooing untamed animals can be a tedious business.
bry: and it is the passion of your heart. you know that if you keep feeding that cat then eventually you're going to stop seeing those bunnies hop out of the bushes...
me: husb, the plan is to woo mittens all the way inside. then we can sit at the window and watch the bunnies together.
bry: oh boy.
me: i was worried about that kitty getting too cold last night.
bry: elise. it's an animal with fur. it can endure the cold.
me: i considered leaving a box with some old towels on the porch...
bry: oh, yeah? why don't you just leave the garage open?
me: well, i thought about that too, but then i didn't want any other critters getting in.
bry: oh my gosh.

we have a stray cat that slinks around our yard. i feed it leftovers in hopes that i can win it over. so far it just stares at me through the window and then darts away. slow progress. we've already named it though so i feel like we're going places with that cat. it's meant to be.

sardines

asher: mom? why did that man say that the sardines have no escape?
me: well, because between the dolphins and the sharks and the birds, they can't get away.
asher: but why can't they get away?
me: because they're going to be eaten.
*he hides his face and burst into tears
me: what's wrong, bud?
asher: I DON'T WANT THE DOLPHINS TO EAT THE SARDINES!
me: oh, darling. i know that's hard to think about. it makes me sad to think about animals being killed sometimes too. but if the dolphins didn't eat the fish, then the dolphins would die.
asher: BUT WHY CAN'T THE DOLPHINS JUST EAT SEAWEED?!?!
me: hmm, that's a good question. did you know that some people believe that before adam and eve sinned that no animals killed others for food? everything ate plants and fruits. so maybe when Jesus comes back and makes all things new and good again, dolphins will eat seaweed.
asher: WHY ISN'T JESUS HERE YET?!
me: well, no one knows, bud. what we do know is that God knows the perfect time for Jesus to come back and so we can trust in Him for the right timing.
asher: BUT I WISH ADAM AND EVE DIDN'T SIN SO THE SARDINES COULD LIVE! I JUST LOVE THOSE SARDINES AND I NEED THEM NOT TO DIIIIIIIIIE!
me: i know, bud. i wish adam and eve didn't sin so we didn't have to worry about sin or death at all, but that makes us want Jesus and love Him even more knowing that God fixed our sin problem when Jesus was here the first time. AND it gives us so much to be excited about and hope for when He comes back again.
asher: yeah...i need to go pray right now. i need to go talk to God about those sardines.
me: ok, bud.
*he walks into his bedroom.

who knew that watching a show about the ocean would generate an opportunity to share the gospel? praying that asher's sweet heart, compassion, and prayers for the salvation of sardines would one day mature into a passion for sharing the gospel with human beings.

love that boy.

brain food

bryan: asher, would like milk or juice to drink?
asher: i'll take the brain food. milk, please.
me: where did you learn that? 
asher: in class, mom. we were learning about our bodies and the teacher told us milk was good for our brains. SO, i'll have the brain food.

yay for homeschool co-op!

family pictures

me: husb! look at all these beautiful pictures!
bry: they are really good.
me: how did she get so many when our tot was so grumpy?
bry: i don't know. she did a good job. look at that one. it looks like nate and i are having a tender moment, but i'm pretty sure i'm having a "talk" with him because he was screaming and refusing to take any more pictures.
me: haha! it looks real sweet though.

my sweet husb had many a "talk" with our little nater on picture day. it went something like this,

bry: nate, you're part of this family and you need to be in these pictures.
nate: NOOOOOOOOO, I'MMMMMM NOOOOOOOT!!!!
bry: well, you're going to be because this is really important to your mother.
me: daddy doesn't like getting dressed up and taking pictures either, tot, but he's doing a really good job.
nate: NOOOOOOOOO! *runs away screeching*

and, yet, michele wallace managed to capture such sweet shots. miraculous.

poop

asher: i think i have to poop! well, no i think i can hold it...
me: asher! just go poop! that's the second time you've said you had to and then decided to hold it.
asher: ugh. i hate pooping. it's so boring.
me: asher, it's a necessary part of life. just do it.
asher: what happens if i don't?
me: your poop backs up in you and you go into septic shock and we take you to the hospital so they can pump it out of you!
asher: pump it out? with what?
me: a tube. right in your b-hole.
asher: ew.
me: i know. so go poop.
asher: ok!

that is what happens when you don't poop, right? also, i am laughing so hard at the word b-hole. kudos to bry for making that part of our family vernacular.

sad eyes

me: ok, nater, let's clip your nails.
nate: *wailing* nooooooo! pwease, mom! noooo! pwease, don't cwip deeeem!
me: nate, you've got raptor claws. it has to be done.
nate: but wook at my face, mom.
me: ok...
nate: can you see my sad eyes?
me: yes.
nate: i have sad eyes because you're trying to cwip my nails.
me: oh, boy.

his sad eyes were even more piercing than his raptor claws. sigh.

darling

me: hey, can i hold your hand, bud?
asher: sure! you can hold my hand anytime you want, darling.
me: oh, wow. thank you, asher.
asher: you're laughing because i said darling?
me: i'm laughing because you're so cute.
asher: well, i'll let you hold my hand because that means i love you.
me: you're so good to me.

we have some moments that i'd rather not dwell on, so they don't get blogged. however, it's sweet moments like these with my boy that i want to remember for always.

burgers

nate: hey, mom!
me: yeah, nater?
nate: wook at dis!
*he holds up his finger
me: whatcha got?
nate: i caught a burger on my finger!
me: oh, nice. a booger.

he calls them burgers. gross.

tights

asher: mom, what's on your legs?
me: those are called tights, bud.
asher: is it paint?
me: nope. they're a piece of clothing.
asher: if i touch it will it get on me?
me: no, babe. it's not paint. you can touch them.
asher: wow, they're soft.
me: yep. they help keep my legs warm.
asher: so they're like pants?
me: kind of. except i have to wear a skirt or dress over them.
asher: *cups his hand and whispers* so people can't see your privates.
me: exactly.
asher: well, i think the other ladies at church are going to like those tights.
me: thanks, asher.

sweet boy. takes after his daddy.

allergic

me: nate, do you want some peanuts?
nate: yeah!
asher: not me! i don't like them.
me: that's ok. you don't have to eat them.
asher: my teacher at the bell church asked me if it was okay for me to eat peanuts and i told her it wasn't, but it's really ok for me eat them. i told her it wasn't because i don't like them.
me: so you told her you weren't allowed to have them?
asher: yeah. i just decided to trick her and tell her i was allergic.
me: woah, bud. you shouldn't pretend to be allergic to something when you're not. it's ok just to say, "no, thank you. i don't like them." did you know that sometimes cookies and candy have peanuts in them? if they think you're allergic and will get sick then they won't let you eat that either.
asher: yeah, i know. i was just tricking.
me: well, you were lying to your teacher, bud. who was it?
asher: uhh, it was jackson's mom.
me: ok, babe. next time you see ms. ashley you need to apologize and tell her the truth, please.
asher: oh, alright. i'll tell her i can eat peanuts, i just don't want to.

shewf. good thing that stinker said his prayers last night.